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July 3, 2010

Forbidden Binkies

"What is that thing in her mouth?!?! Take it out!" That was my grandfather's reaction when he first saw Arissa sucking on her pacifier. Although others don't have such a strong reaction, almost everyone and I mean everyone has an opinion about me giving Arissa a paci. It is the issue that brings the most reaction followed by breast/formula feeding. The questions and comments go from, "Don't give her that?" to "Nooo, it'll make her teeth all crooked" to "Oh so you give her that to shut her up when she is crying?". My response: I give her the pacifier because it soothes her. I give her this pacifier because it's orthodontic and not suppose to mess up her teeth and studies have shown pacifier use to cause dental problems only with prolonged use often past the first 1-2 years of life. I have done my research and I don't plan on allowing her to use the pacifier for even that long. Also, I don't give her that pacifier to shut her up, I give it to her because she was a fussy and colicky baby. And any parent who has had a baby with colic knows that anything that helps soothe your screaming, writhing infant or helps them fall asleep after hours of inconsolable crying is a godsend. Now that her colic has reduced, she only wants her binky during nap and sleep times. Some babies do fine never taking a paci, some suck on their thumbs. I am also aware that weaning a baby of her binky can be tough, but don't we eventually do that for everything (potty training, bottle weaning, sleeping alone in their cribs)? Arissa's 'Binkies' have been godsends not only for us but for her as well. And it has never interfered with her breast feeding. So in the end she is MY baby and this is MY choice. I made an educated decision (plus, I bought the best reviewed pacifiers) and I won't let anyone lead me to thinking I am making wrong parenting choices.
However, I don't actually say all that; sometimes I wish I could. I realize though that these people mean well. They think they are trying to help me, not annoy me. So, I just answer with a smile and a "No, Don't worry, it'll be fine. The doctors have recommended it for her as well" (which they really did since a lot of babies like Arissa don't know how to self soothe when they get all worked up)

Plus - Look how CUTE!! =D....this first one is the pacifier the hospital gave her...the other cute ones are the ones I bought :)


Amy said...

I began to follow your blog from a comment you put on Bringing Up Bumble. I too was married in August of 2008. We just had our first daughter May 8th, 2010. I understand completely what you mean. I get so annoyed with family and friends who think that because I have never before been a mother that I have no clue what I'm doing or talking about. Now, I will give them this much, that sometime as new mother's we don't know what we are doing; but when we say it's what is best for our baby, then as being a mommy, we probably know what is best, so don't try to tell us we don't!! haha :o) Advice is great, but that is just what it is, advice. As mommy's (and daddy's) we make our own choices for our babies. I think you sound like a great mommy! Keep it up!

Antara And Sunvi said...

Hi Amy!
Congrats on your baby girl! Hope you enjoy her as much as we enjoy our little bundle of joy...And I agree with you..And being a new mommy we should also have the right to make our own choices for our children and if they happen to be the wrong ones...well we will just learn from it..
Oh and thanks for the mommy comment...totally made my day! =D

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